Tuesday, October 7, 2008


Grey mornings are always hard for me to find motivation it seems ! This morning is cold and grey and i would just like to be a slug. I could indeed be a slug as I have exercised every day for the last 10 now. However there is this new me who seems to get a panic-y feeling ant the thought of a day without exercise.

Another reason to act slug-like is due to a conversation I recently had with a friend. What were the reasons you felt safe as a fat person ? Sounds crazy, but the truth is there was something very comforting about being overweight, and each of us had our own reasons for finding comfort in that state. Doing the work to lose the weight is only part of the effort needed to get you to goal. The other part is to uncover the motivations that made you believe that state was so desirable, address them and teach them a new way to walk. Without that, you will soon find yourself right back where you started from. It is true. I had lost 110 pounds before I conceived my son, and found myself very close to the point where I had started from.

I have been working on uncovering my own motivators, and it is enlightening to say the least. On the other hand there is a part of me that wants so badly to get the job completely done that I want to linger on the thoughts, making certain I have uprooted all of those roots. They are deep and branch out underground. I do not want to go along , thinking I am done with that work, only to discover a new crop of growth poking up at a later date.

Hmm...why not try pondering while I am pedaling ??? Son's ankle is still tender, so walking is out today.

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