Thursday, May 7, 2009

America is no longer running and Juan Valdez is lost

I am beginning to think that giving up coffee may be the most difficult thing I have had to do in my life ! It does not just wake me up , but helps me to think rationally. Small little details, like you have to put water in a teakettle before putting it on the flame or a stinky thing will happen. Small details like my son is as regular as clockwork and has an ultra efficient digestive tract and does not NEED three tablespoons of wheat bran added to his oatmeal.Or the realization that you must remove your clothes in order to shower.Small details, but important ones.

I did focus enough to make breakfast and not burn down the house- pumpkin oats with olive oil, crasins, coconut, wheat bran, goji berries and flax accompanied with an apple, green tea, yo plus and water. I think I can make this one in my sleep now , which bodes well for my non caffinated future. Afterwords I got dressed , made a pass at blogs and email and then we went out for a walk. I discovered fact number 2- remeber what floor you live on. The maintainance man found us on the wrong floor and asked if we were visiting someone. This getting on the wrong floor detail disturbs me greatly. My mother has Dementia , and hers started manifesting in small ways like this. I calmed myself with reminding me that I am now 12 days without a substance that I have had a close personal relationship almost every day for the last 38 years of my life and I am going to glitch in really disturbing ways.

School went very well ( thank goodness) , and we had something for lunch that has come to be a new favorite
A turkey burger on Arnolds Thins with celery and carrot sticks, yo plus, an apple and a cup of homemade lentil soup. LaCroix on the side to wash it down. Soup and sandwich combo like this have become the easiest, healthiest options for our lunch. We are kind of stuck to a routine of either lentil or minestrone soup here and either a lunch meat sandwich or a burger. Fills you up, quick to make, easy on the wallet and the veggies and soups can be made in advance. When I have five whole minutes strung together and I am actually awake enough to cook without danger.

In the afternoon we went to Sam's for a stock up run. Two surprise finds wile we were there- one was this adorable little wishing well planter filled with plants for my mom, and Arnolds Thins ! Sams carries them for a much lower price in big packs, and these freeze beautifully. The planter was a real find.

My mother's dementia is advanced enough to the point where she cannot figure out how to unwrap a present and giving her a sealed card could leave her rying to figure out what to do with it for hours and ultimately wind up trying to comb her hair with it. Flowers in a planter can be hung on her patio and require no further commitment.

After wandering around for a while to pick up what we needed we headed back home for dinner.


Marinated chicken breasts, carrots, Heartland pasta and a big tossed salad with lemon water to accompany. I am trying to add back the sededs and nuts to my diet to see if it is just the coffee causing the stall in my weight loss. Then it was a night of TV and my husband say the five words that will make me not only shut out any rational thought but get angry enough to want to claw someones face off. So we turned in and I got no sleep for laying in bed wondering just how to tell him if he says them to me again very bad things will happen. It's not the first time he has said them and stupidly i thought he might catch on that they upset me greatly just by my response. he is smart, ,intelegent, compassionate, but still a man (grrrrrrrrrr). And ladies, as you all know, that fact can sometimes erase every good thing on the planet !

Good news is, when I have not gotten any sleep I do seem to be more alert without coffee.

2 comments:

Marisa @Loser for Life said...

LOL! Oh my, caffeine withdrawl is a b*tch, isn't it!!! Well, ease up on yourself; you're doing great and you can make it through this!

There must be something in the air with the hubbies. I was so annoyed at mine yesterday that I told him he had better sleep with one eye open - LOL!

Di said...

I think men don't try intentionally to do stupid things, but when they do them they wander into them with such innocence that they are genuinely surprised at the reaction. (Yes Johnny, if you wander into a pool of gasoline with a lit match, something will get burned). Mine normally does not do things to make me want to question the whole idea of men and women living on the same planet, let alone doing anything as complicated as sharing a life together, but when he does.....

Let's face it, can't live with them sometimes and really don't want to live without them, so we smile and realize this too shall pass.They will wise up and we will rethink our attitude and all will be well once again.