Tuesday, September 7, 2010

When Tuesday feels like Monday

Is it really back to the grind ??? I have to admit- I had way too much fun this weekend to be able to just jump back into the regular pattern of life .

Happily ,drama was resolved before the gathering occurred, and a good time was had by all. And with it comes a new wrinkle  to life that has been forseen, but hoped would be a long way off. But first , the good.  On Sunday we gathered for a cook out at my mom's house, and I was able to reconnect with my best friend tor life, Tim. When we were in high school we would spend just about every free waking moment together, and we were like twins separated at birth.  We lost track of each other for about 30 years, and through a series of  events , we were finally able to get together ( I thank my middle sister for this one !). It was a blast, and it was just the way we were in the younger days, but tempered with age, wisdom and  much more.

Lots of great conversations, laughs and new memories made that day.

Part of the reason for the gathering , and the reconnection with my friend was my mom. She has very advanced Dementia, and for reasons of choice she is being cared for at home. It is honestly a matter of time now before she goes, as her mind has completely and totally left the building.

My middle sister is her primary care giver, and hings are getting very rough with mom as she approaches the end. Tim has worked in nursing homes and has dealt with his own mother and grandmother in their end days, has had a series of bad events and tragedies come his way and was between jobs, so Lady Luck intervened and Tim is now serving as another live in care giver. It is a perfect arrangement , and Mom actually responds to Tim , when she responds at all.She has also developed this very scary habit of standing up and wandering for no reason with no destination, and has wandered out into the yard in the middle of the night. Between these two caregivers they are able to sleep in shifts and have someone always awake to protect Mom from harm and provide her what she needs. To help to support the care givers, I am needing to shift things so that I can get up there a lot more often. I do not expect my mom to live much past the first of the year, and this brings  need to make these final days as good for her and all involved as possible.

Which suddenly makes weight loss seem a whole lot lower on the priority list. The focus shifts for a time to maintaining. It's not that we have reached the goal or are satisfied with where we are at, but rather there is a current bigger fish that needs to be fried, and everything else kind of needs to adjust accordingly. Meals are going to be erratic due to the shifting to do lists during the week to facilitate time spent with mom on the weekends. Homeschool still must happen , and regular household chores must be kept up in order to prevent our own home environment from becoming a stumbling block through this. As is , there has been great struggles to "exercise". Rather than worry about it and create a lot of anxiety about what I cannot do, I must focus on what must be done  and know that it is the best use of my strength, body and mind. I will still weigh, still eat healthy and apply as many of the healthy habits that we have begun as possible.

Weigh in this past Saturday was as follows

Me- UP 0.4
Nick- DOWN 3.6
Bob- DOWN 0.8

I changed the title of this blog because it certainly seems more reflective of our journey. I think it is going to best sum up what is to come


spunkysuzi said...

I'm so sorry about your Mom that's a horrific disease.
Take care of yourself!

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad that I came across your blog. It's good to see another person who finds it important to stay fit and healthy. I have lost over 125 lbs. myself and will be featured in the November 2010 issue of Shape magazine. This is VERY exciting for me! Anyway, my blog is located at www.LauraGetsFit.com if you'd like to check it out. I added your blog to follow, so feel free to follow mine as well. I look forward to reading more of your journey. Take care! <3 Laura

Remember Change is Good! said...

Love the new title! I'm sure you'll have plenty to talk about---on the way to the scale. :-)

Keller said...

Di, you and Tim are indeed an Odd Couple! Glad you reconnected with an old friend. Wow, you mother looks really thin!