Thursday, December 3, 2009

Youtube discovery and NSV

Yesterday I wrote about the idea of having an aerobics DVD for the wheelchair bound, and one of my Facebook friends informed me that such a thing exists , and can be found at Turns out there is a series that includes cardio, tai chi and Belly Dancing from a chair. Amazing ! So I decided to look on Youtube, because if it has been put on film someone somewhere has uploaded at least a part of it. Low and behold , I found this tape for Chair Aerobics put out by a trainer who has a Public Access cable show and happened to injure himself. Brilliant !

I am feeling a little mixed emotions this morning . Yesterday the scale took a big jump up for no reason, and while it is down this morning it is still slightly up from my weigh in last Saturday. I have learned from reading the low carb boards that this is indeed a normal thing for many people as your body adjust from burning glucose to burning fuel.I am also discovering that the deeper into a low carb lifestyle I get, the more my female hormonal cycle returns to a normal rhythm. In my own body, in younger years, I would experience a large gain 4 -5 days before ovulation and then again the week before menstruation. When you are dealing with infertility, your menstrual cycle becomes an incredibly observed thing. For the last 5 years the old patterns had disappeared, but now with the changes in diet they are returning. I have to remind myself hourly that my body is doing what it needs to on it's own time table. No matter what, seeing that number creep up when you are working hard to bring it down makes you feel like a bit of a failure. Meanwhile, the Universe sent me something as if to say No matter what the scale says you are not a failure. About 25 years ago hubby and I made a trip out to New England and one of the stops on the trip was Mark Twain's home in Hartford Connetticut. A very beautiful home, but there was a very odd feeling about it. When I walked in it felt like I was caught in some kind of revolving door, and every inch of the home felt like it was saturated with the presence of a very sad lady. I was really surprised at how intense that felt, considering the owner of the home. Last night we watched Ghost Hunters because i learned they were going to investigate that particular home. I wanted to see if they picked up anything with their equipment, and they did ! While I have no doubt about the things I experienced there , and other places in my life, it was really nice to see some kind of confirmation that could be observed by any one. It just reminded me for the millionth time that I am so much more than a number on a scale and a person struggling with weight loss. I think we should all be gifted with these little reminders on our journey !

1 comment:

Diane Fit to the Finish said...

I'm sorry that you are feeling a bit down about the scale. Even when you are doing everything right, that scale doesn't always cooperate, and it is very frustrating.

I know you already know this, but try and focus on some of those non-scale victories that you have experienced over the last months. There are things that I remember reading in your blog that prove that what you are doing is working. Stay strong - you can do this.

Thinking of you and cheering you on through cyberspace!